friendship – Page 2 – Mimi's Thoughts

From the Heart

Thank you Stephanie…

A few days ago, a cousin of mine dropped by the bakery to find out about my Christmas gift offers for this year. He particularly wanted to know what he could get for different amounts. He had a list of 3 groups, each group having a certain amount budgeted per head. This got me thinking. We all really love different people in different measures, sometimes without even knowing it. Most of the time, it is this measure of love that dictates the amount of money, time and energy we put into gifting to our loved ones.

I got a gift a couple of weeks ago, I was so deeply moved by this gift. It was a mug. Yes, a mug. One would wonder why a mug could mean so much to anyone. Well, first things first, any tea lover would always appreciate a mug…but that isn’t the reason why this mug melted my heart. It wasn’t even my birthday or any special event. I just got a message from Stephanie asking me if I could send someone over to pick up something for me. My first response was shame.

Stephanie is a customer, turned friend, turned sister. We have a special bond I can’t define. I can’t even put a finger on when she became special, but she simply is… special. She recently fell seriously ill. I never went over to see her, we just kept in touch on phone. That’s why my first response was shame. I asked myself why she still cared even after I had not been there for her like I should have. Anyway that’s a story for another day.

Stehnanie is a CAKE LOVER. We would sometimes quarrel about how much cake she was eating and whenever I decided to cut her off cake for a while, she would make up stories and try to convince me to sell cake to her. It was a back and forth thing, almost every week. That is why when the mug Stephanie sent to me arrived, I was deeply moved.

It read “I ❤️ You more than CAKE”

My son’s jaw dropped when I told him who sent it. “Mummy, that means she loves you very well o” was what he said… He knows just how much she loves cake too.

Today, I made some tea in my mug and decided to share this story of love and gifting. Show love to someone this Season, let it be from the heart. I will do same.

Mummy… Hug

I’m a big fan of small crowds. Very funny right? Yes, small crowds. What’s a small crowd by my standards? I come from a family of 7, mum, dad and 4 siblings. However, it was never just 7 of us living together. We always had extended family and sometimes friends and even paid help living in the same house with us. I can confidently say we were never less than 15 people under the roof of our small 3 bedroom flat. It never felt crowded at all. Never. We enjoyed different activities together, we ate together, we worked together. My mom was big on neatness and cleanliness so the ‘work together’ part was very important. Gradually everyone grew up and we’ve all gone our separate ways but we are still closely knit together. My siblings and I keep in touch and talk almost everyday, and it’s the same for the others… Terhemen, Moses, Esther, Angor, Terhemba, Saalu, Imoter, Shimayam and so many more. Every now and again I find myself craving small gatherings like the environment I grew up in. I find joy in small friendly crowds of 10 or so.

In this big love we shared and still share,We didn’t hug. No, we didn’t. My family wasn’t (and still isn’t) a hugging family. This didn’t mean we didn’t love each other, I guess we just expressed our love in other ways, hugging wasn’t just one of the ways. We were more into loud hailings and high fives… Yeah. I never gave it a thought or see anything wrong with it till I grew up and started mixing up with other humans. I’ve learned that people have different ways of expressing love and affection. I also think it’s a learned behaviour. You are either born that way or you learn it from people around you.

My 8 year old is a complete hugger. He can just walk up to me and hug or when I’m busy and can’t see him coming for a hug, he just alerts me by saying “mummy, hug”. I think he has made me more open to others. Lately I’ve found myself hugging family and friends before thinking about it…that’s new. I think I like it. I feel less rigid.

Zoe

In 2011 my husband and I moved into our apartment 8 days after our wedding. We had finally found a house we liked after days of searching and checking out several houses. About a month later, an adorable couple moved into the apartment directly opposite ours. I liked them immediately, i still do…even though they are over 6,000km away now. I maintained a very good neighbourly relationship with the lady up until 2013 when they moved away. Her younger sister moved into the apartment. We did not hit it off like her sister and I did.

I haven’t the faintest clue how it started, but her sister and I gradually began to grow on each other. we found out we had a lot in common and one of those things was fun time. It was funny how she was an out-doorsy person and I was more of an indoor person but we always found a balance some how. I still don’t know how it happened but we actually grew on each other. I knew she was there and I think she knew i was there for her too. we would go on some times for days without seeing each other but that didn’t matter. I got to find out she was very creative. she was inventive. She was never scared to start something new or try something new.

I remember one afternoon we sat at my bakeshop and she asked me to bring home one of my table cakes when I was done for the day. She usually bought them for snacking or to go along with tea at breakfast. On that particular day, she asked me to throw in all flavours. I wish I could describe the way she said it 😂. And so as I baked different flavours for different clients that day, I scooped some into a pan for her and the end of the day I took home a cake with different kinds off cake in it. it became a normal thing. Whenever she needed it, she would tell me a day before or in the morning and then as usual, all flavours would go one scoop or two into a pan for her. It was possible to have lemon cake, red velvet cake, chocolate cake, fruitcake and coconut cake in one pan and she loved it… she created it 😁.

I write this in past tense because she left. she’s over 6,000 km away too. I miss her so much. i remember when she told me she was leaving. she expected me to cry…even I expected me to cry, but I didn’t, but what no one knows is I was so hurt, I was almost upset. it wasn’t until one day, weeks later, after she had left… I came home, looked at her apartment and I went into my room and cried a river. I actually felt a bit better after I did. I miss her a lot.

What amazes me today as I remember this multiple flavoured cake combo is how I never thought to make it available for sale to others. I recently made it for someone and he came back twice.

It is on this note that I brand it ‘Zoe’and will make it a special at my bake shop.